The Happiest Place on Earth

3/2/2017

There is a song, written by Marvin Hamlisch from the not so hit musical, SMILE.   The poor kid who sings it is pining for a better life, somewhere.   When he dreams of this magical place, he dreams about living in Disneyland ….. and there is a reason for that.

Disneyland itself is in California. It is the original, and Walt’s dream. We are Disney World people, since it’s a two hour plane ride and Gianmarco can deal with that and his iPad and Legos rather easily, while I binge watch anything and everything I can on the plane.   In addition, when we are in Disney, we are so consumed by everything fantasy, we forget we have a home, school, garbage, bills, taxes, messy closets, mean friends, and well, a real life.

The Disney conglomerate has managed to suck everybody in, and age is not a criteria.    It’s so cult-ish and brainwashing, you forget about the lines, the endless sea of strollers and screaming kids, and imbibe in the smells of buttered popcorn, the wafting from the bakery on Main Street, the steam from the turkey legs, and everything else that beckons, “eat me.”   We don’t just go for the food, although it is a draw.   Here, I can wear things I wouldn’t wear at home on a daily basis, like, ever….sneakers, jean shorts, bunhead, and nobody cares. (Although hipmom stays casually hip..lol) Kids can be messy, noisy, drooly, unkempt, and it’s all ok, cuz Disney is here.

Disney, I must say, keeps up with times with every beat of the Lion King’s conga drum, and nothing is left to dangle.   We utilize their meal plan every time, and since it is like meal time on a mission trip to the Ozarks with my family whenever we eat, it is a plentiful dream come true.   They have several levels, so what is good for us, may not be good for you, but we have abundant food and drink, snacks, and with the “dab” of your Magic Band, it is all at your service and already paid for. (You forgot you paid before you left…that’s the best part…you almost think it’s free..lol)

Disney also invites you to use their Disney Experience App, which kept me organized on on target.   Making dinner reservations as far in advance as possible is key, and if you can swing it, make your fast pass selections then, too, although, that usually is too far in advance for me, but if you can swing it, you can get on the primo rides.   The fast pass is pretty streamlined, although now, you have to use up all your rides before you can get a new one. I had my kids deal with all that because I get too flustered moving everybody around and clicking who goes where. But, in the end it’s simple, and now seamless.   I will admit three years ago, I had such a bad experience with the advent of the band and the fast pass, they ended up giving us a free vacation…but that’s a long story.   In the end, Disney will follow through, and is so happy to accommodate they will do everything they can to make your visit “Magical.”

Pregnant woman: I think I am having my baby now.

Disney Employee: No problem ma’am, we now have a birthing and delivery center right in Tomorrowland.   Your other kids can enjoy the park and the magic, while you deliver your new mousketeer!   We have a team of specially trained Disney OB’s waiting for you…

That’s exactly what it’s like…you forget your own existence…nothing is real there, and that’s why we like it. Thank you, Walt Disney, for creating a place that is so smitten with me and my happiness, I go home depressed.

But, it’s well worth it!